Ephemeral Delusion

Tuesday, June 17, 2008, 12:43 AM
Sick in the head, still sick in the head.

I miss Cambodia, I really do.
I'd put up photos and updates and stuffs asap, as soon as I get all the things in place.

Its probably that 'getting out of reach from everyone (yes everyone i did sieved)' feel that captivates me, or rather was it a rare escape from the mundane responsibilities which are genuinely nerve breaking?

I am only disappointed, on those beautiful starry nights, how do lovers sit by the balcony and swim through the shooting stars; now see the dark yet silent mystery. I should be thinking, should have kept those machines working; yet I slept. For 21 nights my brain went on a vacation, to where to I ask, Morocco.. I dare not suggest?

It is no longer a secret, this undeniable failure of mine to be decisive, yet kudos to the success for being able to conceal yet the unspeakable. Irony isnt it, people may laugh, but when your not in the scenario, you wont be able to understand the unwritten pain in the characters heart. Just like how M lust for her, to be hers. This is pain, sheer fucking pride and foolishness destroys all epiphanies The Greatest may have at all.

I wander around in hunger, not for food nor knowledge. That miraculous little thing can save my life, can destroy lives; yet I yearn for it, dream of it, dying from being deprived from it. Help save a life, I think of ways to save mine.

This is like an itch, the more you scratch, the more swollen and itchy it gets. On a bad day, it may just spread, like an invisible force that is more powerful than any pills at all, it will slowly consume you.




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